My Life As It Is…Series IV

The sound of the alarm brought me back to reality from my sojourn into the past that still gives me the jitters whenever I remember. At the ripe age of 25, I was still holding onto the past so much that it has refused to allow me to forge ahead in my life.

I stared unfocused at my opened ruled notebook filled with a half page of my latest writing.
You see, my story is one that I want to tell the whole world about. I want to bare my heart to whoever would listen about what I faced as a teen staying with my parents and siblings. The humiliation and jests I went through in their hands- especially my brothers’. The taunts and ridicules from mother and Laila, the terror of them all. Yes, I called her that though she is my only sister and the last child of the house.

The thing is that my family has kicked, hit and hammered my self-esteem into the ground. The lowest it could ever go. My mother that was supposed to be my main supporter also joined them in destroying my much-needed confidence. You may be thinking where the heck is the man of the house? dearest father. How I’ve missed him. He was my champion in it all. He was forever defending me from my mother and other brothers for picking on me without any reason.

Dear father, I miss you so much. Why did you leave me so soon? Why have you gone to the world beyond never to be seen again?
Yes, I know we shall meet again in the hereafter, but I need you here now.

A lone tear rolled down my right cheek unnoticed until it hit the opened page on the table and splattered across. The liquid sparkled as my reading lamp reflected on it and it started soaking into the paper. I was transfixed as I watched the tear slowly disappear into the page and soak the landing area. The tear shall completely vanish and dry out in some minutes, I thought.

Is this how my dream of becoming a published author going to disappear into thin air? Just like the lone tear? Am I ever going to be able to overcome my fear and rise up to my utmost best version of me?


To be continued in the next installment.

What do you think Usman’s final decision would be?

Is he going to take the bull by the horn to fight for his right to be heard? Or is he going to be forever cowered by his low self confidence and never emerge to be at his best?

Do share your thoughts in the comment box.

And kindly share away with your friends and family that can benefit. 😀


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