I have come to a crossroad in my life where I need to make a life-changing decision for myself alone. There are some self-evaluation tests I need to go through. There are loads of questions I need to get answered before I could forge ahead.
Am I ready to do all these seemingly insurmountable tasks? A huge question. My mean inner self kept drawing me back and convincing me that I wasn’t ready to take the big plunge.
Do I listen to him?
Yes! It screamed.
But I want to go to the next stage in my life. I want to get unstuck from all the bad energies that are keeping me from shining through with my God given talent.
But, you aren’t ready, the mean boy reiterated.
What if I am? I asked. I am tired of the back and forth and with my life not having a direction.
Give it another 5 years and you shall be ready, rattled my mean self.
No! And I turned off it’s annoyingly penetrating chiming tone. How I wish I could do that all the time it reared its ugly head. It is getting increasingly shriller than the last time I had a conversation with it. And it is so draining going back and forth and back and forth.
I need to charter my goals and be intentional in making them happen even if it’s going to take a long time. They say a long journey starts with a step.
I am in chapter 2 of my book. The chapter is all about how I have allowed the fear of my mother and siblings’ destructive criticisms to ruin my enthusiasm for my writing. Should I share the beginning with you? I will take the answer to be ‘yes’.
I am always sensitive to share my ‘not too’ sterling story with another person. I fear their judgement to the extent of goose pimples covering my arms whenever I think of it. But since I have decided to leave my comfort zone, I shall rein in my fears and allow you into my worst scare. Are you ready? Here goes.. (to be continued)
The next installment will be sent only if most of you respond in the comment below that you want the story continued. I want to give you the best and don’t want you reading what you don’t enjoy.:)
So, indicate in the comment box. Until then, do have a fabulous weekend!